Songs for the (avoidance) of the DNC
As the Democratic National Convention starts really sticking its claws into the city, mixtapes and protest songs are popping up everywhere. But what are those of us on the “meh” side of the political spectrum supposed to do? Especially all of us being forced into it by our work or home’s proximity to downtown. What are we going to listen while New York Times journalists blog away their days at Starbucks?
Abba – “Another Town, Another Train”
Taking a trip on the train will be a new occurrence to many, as parking will be impossible in downtown. “I guess (you’ll) be spending life in railway stations.” But at least you can look back on the DNC and remember that “Nothing lost and nothing gained.”
Cee-Lo/Goodie Mob – “Cell Therapy”
While you’re walking home or taking the bus, you might come across some protest pens filled with grizzled Braveheart-looking youngsters looking ready for action. But don’t worry, they’re in their cells, but Cee-Lo still asks the question, “Who’s that peeking in my window?” Don’t worry, it’s just a reporter from Slate.com.
Dismemberment Plan – “Come Home”
The opening line, “Called in sick to work today, couldn’t have gotten a damn thing done,” sounds like your life eh? Too bad you couldn’t call in sick since all the smart people took the week of the DNC off months ago. Sucker.
I’m from Barcelona – “Chicken Pox”
There are a lot of songs in this world that just need a few changes and all the sudden they are about something else. All you really need to do is change the title of this song to “DNC,” and the line, “As a kid I had the chicken pox… and I don’t ever want to go through that again,” to “As a kid I was at the DNC…” It’s a good thing you can’t have it once you had it, right?
Elton John – “Sorry Seems to be the Hardest Word”
If you happen to be caught in between any of the “shit” then you might find yourself searching for an apology, either from the officer who nabbed you with a gelatinous spider web (they have those right?) or from the protestor who accidently covered your pearl white power suit in a urine bomb… just remember, it might never come, after all, “sorry seems to be the hardest word.”
George Harrison – “All Things Must Pass”
Are smoke bombs, long lines at Jamba Juice and traffic jams getting you down? Fret not, George Harrison has your mantra, “it’s not always going to be this way, all things must pass, all things must pass away.”
The Pinups – “Lookin’ For Boys”
You know what a lot of journalists and politicians are? Boys! So get on you bikini and “go lookin’ around, east side, west side, all over town.” Girls, now is your time – take those rich gonzo boys for all they got, fries and burgers galore!
Bruce Haack – “National Anthem to the Moon”
So the U.S. is where you live, but that doesn’t mean you have to sing that silly national anthem and be proud during the convention. Nope, you can sing along to Bruce Haack’s own anthem with lines like, “Love me now, before you have to go away… Nothing stays the same and things are changing every day, make it now while we have time to make it all the way.” Now if that isn’t a definition of “change” I don’t know what is.
Justice – “D.A.N.C.E.”
You ever notice that if you were to try to pronounce DNC it would come out “dance?” Yeah, that’s right, maybe it’s just the media coverage seeping into by water-blogged brain, but I’m pretty sure this song says, “Easy as ABC, do the DNC.” Just remember, “black or white it doesn’t matter… whatever happens, do the DNC.”
Tom Waits – “What’s He Building?”
Many of us haven’t had a chance to see what’s going on inside the Pepsi Center, which leaves us begging the question, “What the hell is he building in there? He has subscriptions to those magazines, he’s hiding things from the rest of us… what about all those packages he send?” So Obama, what are you building in there? Not a playhouse for the children that’s for sure, “change,” perhaps?













