The world’s first interactive, choose-you-own adventure concept album. Coming 2011.

Little know fact about me: my first novel was a dystopian epic called When the World Exploded. It was published (and copyrighted) in May of 1993. You don’t believe me? I have two .pdf’s to choose from: high-quality and low-quality. My favorite line is the Joyce-ian, “The animals ruled and the people melted.”

Spoilers ahead

Video games have a terrifically terrible time deciding what they are. Are they interactive movies? Interactive narratives? Are they just time-wasters? If they are any of these things, how do they do what they need to do to get their point across? Do they have a point? What is it?

Limbo circumvents a lot of the problems of modern games by removing a few key elements: dialogue, plot and music. What we get is an experience — but still a narrative. Let me explain.

First and foremost, here is what we know about Limbo: a boy is in a world, the world is kind of fuzzy and black and white, it’s very dark, everything and everyone is out to get him. You control the boy through a series of perilous encounters with giant spiders, people throwing spears and giant machines. Eventually the game ends with you coming across a girl picking flowers. You do not speak to the girl or even approach the girl — in fact there is no guarantee it’s even a girl.

Narrative once meant “to narrate.” This isn’t really the case any more — nowadays it means to exist and tell a story. This story doesn’t need to be explained, it just needs to exist. For all intents and purposes, Limbo does not have a plot — it has a narrative, but no plot. What does this mean exactly? It means the user is allowed to generate the experience based on the day-to-day activity of this little boy. For all we know this is a normal circumstance for our avatar — this is a normal day — he travels around a darkened landscape, avoiding death on every corner and trying merely to survive.

Or maybe it’s not. Maybe this is a special circumstance — maybe by “limbo” they mean purgatory — or hell — or dreams — we can’t know for certain — which is what makes this an interesting form of storytelling. It’s the concrete “being there” we get and nothing else. It’s an experience more concerned with narrative as an art — as what we view and interpret rather than a plot.

Is this still a narrative though? Yes it is. It’s not traditional — but I would find it hard to believe the developers didn’t have a plot in mind when they painted this picture. It’s closer to Perec’s Life: A User’s Manual than it is to a game in its narrative. The difference between this and say, Uncharted 2 is that we are assumed to be intelligent, creative humans that are capable of filling in the gaps. That isn’t to say there is anything wrong with Uncharted 2 — for every Fellini there needs to be a Michael Bay — the two forms, as well as all others can coexist without there ever being a “right” solution. What Limbo does is give us a narrative without a plot — and for that, I’m thankful, grateful and incredibly impressed.

(above video for reference only)

Work it,
make it,
do it,
Makes us harder, better, faster, stronger!

[Chorus]
What does not kill us
Shall make us stronger!
But we need to hurry
For the nights of Sauron are over!
We shall overcome
Even if the ring makes nights go longer!
The time is upon us
When Sarumon is upon us!
I need my precious!
I need your precious!

We arrived in Rivendale tonight
You could be my black Arwen tonight
No Elrond, I am the leader tonight
We do not care what Mordor says tonight

We have these elven cloaks
No other race can make them like this now!
But our travels are not complete

Bow in the presence of greatness!
Because right now Gandalf has forsaken us
But he’ll be back cloaked in whiteliness

He cannot believe he took this ring with him
Passed down from his older kin
He is losing his mind with each and every step
Sam is trying to take this
The new word shall give us a break.

[Chorus]

We need you right now
We need you right now

I’m not certain if Aragorn is your man or not
If you have decided to leave Rivendale or not
If Elrond will let me on the boat or not
These drinks Gimli gave us have me saying a lot
But I think Sauron put you in front of me
Oh heavens, how could you have lied to me?
There are a thousand elves to choose from and only one of me
I’m sorry, I must be caught in the eye of he

This is a star-studded night
So we’ll do anything that I want
Put the ring on and give Sam a haunt
I’ll do anything for an elf-aunt
But you’ll just do anything you want
Your elf powers control the horse jaunt
Oh my elven love, you’re making it (harder, better, faster, stronger)

The dame tried to lift my cash like a hot air balloon. She had me with a look I could feel in my hip. She was a gold digger — she came at me fast, but I wasn’t a golden boy. I knew her story. I could see what she was going for and it wasn’t me. My scotch soaked jacket and cigar scented shadow threw her off my trail. I knew her story and it wasn’t a pleasant one. Just go dance girl, go ahead and dance.

This dame roulette met a guy at the Times Gazette. She had a purse by Chanel under her arm like a long necked gazelle. She called him a man because the cut of his suit. She could tell he’d had enough dames to fill a milk can. He told her, “not any bird will do,” and asked if she was the one. The psychic told him she would have the eyes of Claudette Colbert, Joan Crawford, Greta Garbo.

He took her up to Hollywood. Pulled up in a washtub pretending to be a taxi. They had a bite to eat, but her wallet was thin as a toothpick. Her legs could make a bishop turn coy so he paid off the tab. She’s been around the block more times than a meat wagon on the Fourth of July.

Years later

I heard this dame popped out a kid with a face like a bucket of mud. The poor sap’s paying for it while driving around the valley, lost like an onion on a sundae. He’s flashing his smile on a newsreel for money. She was supposed to buy the kid a ball cap with this money. Instead she had her lips pumped like an allergic bee sting making her face look like an amputated leg on its way to the opera.

His lawyer probably pushed for a pre-nup. Her voice, smooth as a golden egg, disappeared the idea.

Years later

He finds out the kid wasn’t even his.

I’m not saying you’re a gold digger ma’am. You just want a man to smoke, but not to spot the flame. When his wallet gets thinner than his hair you leave. Poor guy’s trying to work his way up like Coolidge in Massachusetts. You don’t care though, you’re a gold digger.

Everyday we as human beings get up and do our routine. We take a shower, we work, we love, we eat with utensils, we travel. It’s these mundane events that add character to our lives — whether it be the type of job we have, the kind of furniture we own or the type of people that like us. This accumulation of the mundane is how we become known to acquaintances and thus becomes the way we convey our story to the outside world.

Video games do not generally catalog these everyday worlds, but that doesn’t mean some haven’t tried. While The Sims latches onto this idea full force, it fails to recognize the other portion of the equation: the incredible. In a mystical, magical world, like say, a video game world, the incredible is arguably the most important facet of engagement. But by encompassing and utilizing  the mundane,  plotless narratives can develop, even if the designers don’t intend on it.

Take Fable II as an example. If you’ve played the game yourself, you’d likely describe the narrative of the game as being something like this: I found a box, wandered around the world, bought a house, got a husband/wife, accidentally cheated on husband/wife when a Frankensteinian scientist resurrected a woman who fell in love with me on first site, had children, gave gifts to peasants, worked at the blacksmith, watched my dog die and then did some big event for some reason I can’t remember.

The most important takeaway in Fable II is the mundane, it’s not the plot. The plot is a bland revenge fantasy — but the hours the player spends working, exploring, expressing and emoting is the narrative the player walks away with. It’s these seemingly trivial things that not only affect the world’s view on you, they have an effect the outcome of the game — they make the narrative what it is.

While Fable II takes this idea to its maximum, it still has the issue of being convoluted in its plot. Would anyone have minded terribly if the plot was removed? Or rather, if the narrative itself just naturally built up to a logical end, as opposed to working in opposition of the mundane narrative? I’d like to think not. I’d like to think that the plot of the game would have benefited immensely from just existing in the background — maybe even happening on “accident.” Either way, it’s one of the few games that do this — and many others could stand to learn a thing or two from Fable II.

Take the Mass Effect series. Here you’re given the opportunity to save the universe — twice (three times, perhaps?). But what exactly are you saving? Sure, Bioware does an excellent job of layering the world together to reveal a semi-livable place — but who are you? What defines you? In Mass Effect it’s your reactions that define you, it’s how you react to conversation nodes. Comparing that to Fable II, where your actions define you showcases the primary difference between the two. In one, you react to the world, in the other, the world reacts to you. Because of this reactionary measure, Mass Effect is a bit doomed to always play as an experience rather than a full fledged life. Who is Commander Shepherd? We only get the emotions of him/her, we never see the mundane. Do space cowboys even have a mundane?

I could go on and on with a slew of more comparisons, but I think I’ll end here. The main argument I’d like to make is that the mundane is okay — no matter how extravagant or over the top the plot of a game is — it’s the personal narrative that’s going to have an effect on the player. We don’t need action all the time — look at a game like Far Cry 2, now get rid of the random encounters — now think about how normal it would be to drive across the environment and how incredible it would be.

It’s the mundane, the commonplace, the everyday that makes a narrative worth exploring — it’s not the plot. After all, as the saying goes — before enlightenment we chop wood, carry wood — after enlightenment we chop wood, carry wood.

Insiders tip: They’re all from the same place! Different time periods, different look! What’s going on here?!? Time will tell!

Pop songs aren’t known for their efficiency in resolving stories. Often times they’ll introduce an idea and never flesh it out. Truth be told, far too often we’re left wondering what ever happened and it’s this wonderment that has caused us to finish out some of these stories.

Case in point, we’ve always wondered what exactly happened to Jon Bon Jovi, who in 1986 publically declared himself to be “wanted dead or alive” by an entity he never names.

We are going to assume then the entity in question is another cowboy faction, perhaps a group of bounty hunters, maybe the government. But what did Bon Jovi do to cause this rebel status? The information we have gives little information: we are aware he is a cowboy and because of historical fact we know cowboys are often times wanted for actions such as looting trains, shoot outs in the street and drinking whiskey in saloons.

However, Mr. Bon Jovi doesn’t appear to be involved in any murder as he only walks around with a six-string on his back. He does however note the fact he has seen a million faces and rocked every single on of them. Could this be the deed that caused his wanted poster to erupt across the west? Perhaps it’s the fact he had invented a system for telling the day of the week by what type of bottle he’s drinking out of?

The most compelling evidence we’ve unearthed from years of research lead us to believe Jon Bon Jovi himself wasn’t actually a wanted criminal but rather his steel horse was the culprit. For those unaware, he doesn’t travel by the traditional cowboy appliance of a horse, but rather a steel horse. This horse is a steam-powered horse with red eyes that shoot lasers and a tail that turns into a shotgun.

As chronicled in the song, Bon Jovi goes days without sleep. This can cause a delusional state, a state in which he may have been unaware of the activity his steel horse was taking part in: killing prostitutes. Because of his relationship with the horse, authorities pinned these murders on him and subsequently he was forced to ride all night just to get back to his homestead.

Contrary to popular belief, this case was actually resolved in Johnson v Bon Jovi in Twobit, Nevada. It took some real digging to find the core of the story here, as it seems Bon Jovi himself might have destroyed many of the documents.

Court record prove when brought up to the witness stand, Bon Jovi, drunk on Tuesday, described his lack of sleep and his ability to only “play for keeps” to a panel of his peers. Sympathetic but unforgiving the jury was nearly ready to hand out the verdict of guilty when the steel horse stormed the courtroom and attempted to murder the jury. With a quick and steady resolve, Bon Jovi himself took his own horse down.

The charges were dropped and he was once again free to rock the faces of millions across the globe. In a public statement he later apologized for the actions of his horse stating, “We weren’t born to follow, we have to stand up for what we believe.”

UPDATE (FEB 20): It looks like my I/O interface, an Omega Lexicon Pro has officially bit the dust, making recording live an impossibility. Before anyone tells me to record track by track, be forewarned, I don’t roll like that. Live or not at all. This doesn’t mean Space Pilgrim isn’t going to be recorded soon, it most certainly will be, as I’m really happy with the songs and the words and story are totally stupid and absurd. I’ll make it happen eventually, but not by February 28. Insert obligatory sad-face.

On top of that I’m also kicking jams and ideas out for Mojiferous’ “Increase Speed, Drop Down, Reverse Direction,” (video below).

2010 is going to be an awesome, productive year for the Republic. Keep your eyes on the prize.

The Sims 3

The Sims series has always inexplicably weirded me out and after watching this rather odd trailer nothing has changed. Maybe it’s too heady for me. Maybe I just don’t get this new emergent narrative thing.

Battlefield: Bad Company 2

Okay, this one’s not really as big of a deal as it might seem on the surface, but when EA Europe boss Jens Uwe stated: “In March we will launch Battlefield: Bad Company 2, which is our first strong attack on Call Of Duty,” it feels to me like the game is being formulated as a response to Call of Duty. Maybe the problem in my head stems from the fact EAs other shooter series, Medal of Honor is being updated to modern times too. Or maybe a game that’s a response to another game is just silly to me, it’s like saying MADTV is a response to SNL. In the end the influences are so transparent they push everything backwards instead of forwards.

Mass Effect 2

I have no idea what planet EA or Bioware or whoever is responsible for this remarkably stupid preview is from, but I don’t ever want to go there. Who the fuck thinks introducing faux-metal and some Tank Girl looking “bitch” into a science fiction game is a good idea? And why do they think fans of the series will be into this incredibly stupid promo? I feel dumber just watching it. At least it ends with the eponymous line, “Now who’s the badass biotic, bitch?” Or rather, “Now who’s the badass biotic bitch?” Actually, I’m not really sure how to transcribe that one.

Dragon Age: Origins

Marilyn Manson was just one of the “metal” songs used in a Dragon Age trailer, furthering the conclusion that I came too long ago: People who are into cheesy dark metal/goth are also into cheesy high-fantasy and probably never get laid (although what comes first, the metal or the lack of sex is still a mystery). I have no idea what connection I’m supposed to make here, other than there isn’t one, and this was just supposed to be a badass soundtrack to get me into the game. Weirdly, it had the opposite effect. Also, it fails to demonstrate the type of game this is, a tactical RPG. New shit? I think not.

Dante’s Inferno

Okay, Dante’s Inferno: the Game. Where to start with this one? Perhaps the “official” novelization of the game which is based on the book and pictured above (yeah that’s the book cover, not the game cover)? Or maybe the embarrassingly stupid Christmas themed trailer? How about I let you judge those on you’re own, and continue on to showcase some highlights from the PR trail:

• The “Fake Protest: (all links lead to Kotaku, because I’m lazy)” EA stages a religious protest against the game… to garner attention… um…
• The “Sin to Win Contest:” EA challenges people at Comic-Con to commit acts of lust by taking pictures of booth babes.
• How about the “Killing Babies” achievement which may or may not make it into the final game?
• Mailing $200 checks to potential game reviews: Pretty much self-explanatory here, not that it’s any different than a Halo themed free Xbox or the various other schwag. At least they’re being transparent on this one.

Chances are I missed some strange and usual advertising and PR techniques utilized for some of the handheld games or even some of the sports games (those sell themselves though right?), but other than selling Madden 2010 anywhere with a cash register I couldn’t remember anything. To be fair, I hold nothing against the developers on these, and hell, chances are Electronic Arts probably outsourced half these anyway, but I’m not going to lie, the Mass Effect 2 trailer made me less excited about the game, the Dragon Age: Origins trailer made me uninterested, the Battlefield comment made me sad and the Dante’s Inferno collection of missteps is still making me chuckle.

Coincidence? Or are the Assassin’s still deeply embattled with the Templars? Perhaps the Templars are running the world after all… with us, the peasants left pulling staples out of walls, waiting for someone to rescue us. To speak up for the little guy.

1. Top Ten Songs from the ’00s That Will Puzzle Future Generations

2. Ten of the Best Soundtracks of the Decade

3. Ten of the Best Reissues of the Decade.

4. Ten Best Video Game Soundtracks of the Decade

5. Top Ten CD/LP Packaging of the Decade

6. Top Ten Cover Songs of the Decade

My favorite albums have been written up and sent off to the printing press as well, so those are only available on that ancient and strange medium of paper (I think anyway, maybe they’ll be online? They don’t tell me these things).

I thought briefly about going into the why’s and what’s of the list, but decided to leave it at just a list. I’ve gotten to work on my decade lists as well, which will be entirely different from any other decade lists because they will have nothing to do with content (everyone else seems to have the music and the game quality thing covered). I will be tackling it from another angle — and I’m not going to reveal that until I print it here because I don’t want you sods stealing my idea.

On another note, don’t forget to include The Republic of Thoronia’s Soundtrack to Simoebic Dysentery on your “best of” list this year, if you liked it that is (I need not remind you it took 3rd place in audio in a competition, do I? I didn’t think so).

10. Kraftwerk – The Catalogue (Reissue)

9. Fell – Incoherent Lullabies

8. Bibio – Ambivalence Avenue

7. Raekwon - Only Built 4 Cuban Linx… Pt. II

6. Rock Plaza Central – At the Moment of Our Most Needing

5. Black Moth Super Rainbow - Eating Us

4. The Flaming Lips – Embryonic

3. Mos Def – The Ecstatic

2. The Feelies – Crazy Rhythms (reissue)

1. Future of the Left – Travels With Myself and Another (thanks Mojiferous!)

Ten Band-Inspired Costume Ideas:

Halloween, the time when adults decide to don their favorite witty getups, whether it be the intellectual “Freudian slip” or the pop culture driven “Christian Bale Yelling.” We’re sure some of you are short on ideas, so we’ve compiled a list of band inspired costumes to wear to your favorite party. So then, what are you going to be…

Recast: What the Ghostbusters 2 Soundtrack Should Have Been:

Last Recast, we looked at film with an excellent score and added some licensed music to spice it up with mixed results. This time around we’ll look at one of the arguably worst licensed soundtracks of any film, Ghostbusters 2. Now, keep in mind, we’re not saying we don’t appreciate Randy Edelman’s score here but the soundtrack is such a ugly sign of its times it’s in need of some serious work. This is Recast, in which we appoint ourselves soundtrack supervisors of existing films…

Recast: What the Blade Runner Soundtrack Could Have Been:

Movie soundtracks have the ability to create mood and atmosphere in an interesting way when utilized properly. Changing or adding to a soundtrack is a way to create a completely new experience. Blade Runner is one of the greatest science fiction movies of all time but the soundtrack has always felt a bit lacking. Although the film doesn’t feature any licensed music, that doesn’t mean it shouldn’t have. Even though these proposed changes would dramatically change the mood of the film, we’ve got a few suggestions for where Ridley Scott could have ditched the Vangelis score in favor of some less ambient music. Welcome to the inaugural edition of our latest feature, Recast, in which we appoint ourselves as soundtrack supervisors for an existing film…

I’ve been a bit busy making giant amounts of money writing elsewhere, thus I’ve been ignoring this free to read pile of crap. Anywhere look at things here!

Top Ten Reunions We’d Like to See

In recent history we’ve been treated to the reunions of Mission of Burma, Gang of Four, Antipop Consortium, among others. This year, Faith No More, Sunny Day Real Estate and Pavement got back together, and, of course, there’s the ever pervasive rumors of Soundgarden reconvening at some point. But who’s still left? Are there any bands out there with the majority of their members still alive that haven’t reunited already? Here’s the reunions we’d like to see. Check out our wish list and feel free to weigh in with yours…

Top Ten Reunions We’d Rather Not See

There have been a lot of bands in the history of the universe and most of them, at one point or another, have broken up. Surprisingly, we’ve found the majority of them have reformed despite themselves. Another surprise is the amount of bands still playing — Better Than Ezra, Seven Mary Three, the Troggs, and the Zombies — despite their lack of a mass audience. Last week, we waxed on our dream reunions. This week, we offer up ten bands we think should just stay dead, for one reason or another…

Ten Potential Supergroups We’d Like To See

It seems like we can’t go a year without running into a few new supergroups popping up  to play a show or record an album. Whether it’s Danger Mouse teaming up with Sparklehorse, Monsters of Folk, or, most recently, Flea and Thom Yorke, musicians are constantly looking for new ways to present their ideas and sounds. It got us wondering about what potential super groups might be waiting on the horizon, simply biding their time before a surprise show or pay-what-you-want download. Check out the ten potential collaborations we’d dreamed up after the jump and, of course, feel free to contribute some ideas of your own…

More things to come soon, including detailed notes on the “final” Simoebic Dysentery build, thoughts on several games, and bonus ridiculous stories and hilariously terrible scripts involving vampires, robots and maggots.