Dear King Thor,
I’ve been reading your blog for several yrs. Like, how much effort would it take to update more often?
Waitin’ Wally
Dear Waitin’ Wally,
It is not within the realm of the Good King’s Knowledge to answer this question, which appears to be a rude comment, which is not okay and not worthy of being commented upon for the sake of the talk of the one and True and Good King. For now then we wait.
Always Yours,
King Thor
Dear Thorin,
Hey man, what’s up? I’ve been listening to Episode 1 and I’m a bit curious of something. In “Here is Where We Are” you say that the King is “Watching over you” but on page 13 of the Second Book of Thoronia, you say “The King neither sees nor cares what happens in your world.” So, which is it?
Utterly Confused
Dear Utterly Confused,
I can see your confusion. However, I think that you’re forgetting about the Adventures of the Good King: the graphic novel. On page 56, when speaking to Athanasius Kircher and William Tell, the Good King mentions that although he watches the people that he has created, he doesn’t really pay attention to what they are doing.
Dear King Thor,
Why don’t you include instrument lists, or band members or anything with your albums?
WTF
Dear WTF,
In Thoronia, we prefer to remain anonymous. But, I suppose that since you asked, we can share a few things. Here are the band members that were involved with the recording of Simoebic Dysentery: ______________ – Roland SH-201. On Episode 1, the instruments included: Accordion, Keyboard, Drums, vocals, spoons, whistling and a computer. Thanks for asking!
King Thor
Dear Thorin,
Why won’t you sing in your real voice? You some kind of pussy?
Sincerely,
Pussy Puncher
What makes you think that I don’t sing in my own voice? For all you know I don’t even exist, and this whole thing is just a complex algorithm that was recorded hundreds of years ago and is playing out on this blog and webpage. The voice is not the voice of a human, or a god, but of a computer. This all exists purely so that you, Pussy Puncher, would have an excuse to live, and now that this wall has been broken, the wizard exposed, you no longer have a purpose.
Dear Residing King Thor & Friends,
Subject: Show this Friday, November 7th
Hello people. We have announcement making potential. This time, four or five six months ago, the Republic of Thoronia Band played a show. Now we make it again. November 7 at the hi-dive. Opening for Sunburned Hand of Man, Franklin’s Mint and Outer Neon. Funny thing is, show start at 9 o’clock. Not a joke. For real. Be there at 9 or miss the RoTB. Thanks.
Sincerely,
Good King Thor
Is missing in action right now. President Bush is missing his math skills. How many people live in the United States? More than 300.
I’m not one to generally go about internet-Bush-bashing, but this was one of more funny clips from our president’s legacy, and sounds too much like something King Thor might have said. Perhaps that’s were he’s run off to than? Into Bush’s body? Only time will tell.
Super Ants Attack Houston — Yep, super ants. They use their dead to build bridges over pesticide, have multiple queens and are destroying electronics. Take that Sylvester Stallone!
Chinese realize censorship is bad, or at least that they can’t control it… — The recent earthquake in Central China has given us some terrifying images. Suprisingly, the Chinese government hasn’t tried to hold back a nation that boasts being the leader in owners of cell phones, digital cameras and other gadgetlike do-hickeys.
Toyota tries to show Honda’s Asimo whose boss – Fails, because nothing is cooler than Asimo.
For those worried about zombie related injuries – Wired has a wiki-how to for you. Go! Get out! Hurry!
Neil Young gets a spider named after him — A biologist at East Carolina University has named a trapdoor spider Myrmekiaphila neilyoungi. I’ve always thought Neil Young’s strange hair was a little spider like.
Myspace wins Spam lawsuit — I’m sure that we’ll all get a piece of that financial pie. No?
Cyclists take to freeway — Proof that cyclists can have hard heads some times. But, you know, proves that gridlocked traffic sucks too.
Decemberists prove they’re smart by opening up for… Obama? – Yep, now even indie bands have a say. Didn’t the Canadian act Arcade Fire do the same thing? Well, at least the Decemberists can vote in America. Of course, they don’t help Obama’s struggle with the working class, being the slightly pretentious college educated folk that they are. But they do up the adorability factor of Obama’s campaign.
Don’t worry, the Scarlett Johanson album is terrible – I mean really really really really really really really really really really really bad. Even if you don’t like Tom Waits you’ll be offended. It’s even produced by one fo the guys from TV on the Radio, has some famous people like some guy named Nik Zinner and some flamboyant guy named David Bowie doing stuff — but guess what? You can’t stop a piece of shit from stinking by adding more crap to it!
King Thor was going to start recording on Sunday — And realized that he was missing a power chord. Boo-urns. Don’t fret though! The recording starts today. Geffen Records here I come!
